i think i mentioned it before but my bike got stolen – well they caught the guy who stole it – wouldnt you just know it – he was a chav – yeah – they showed me a picture of him – baseball cap and everything – it was this pixellated CCTV still – from like a cash converters or somewhere – cos the police had sent out the description of my bike to all the second-hand shops – silly bastard – he might have known the police would do that – so when they caught him they came round my house – to take a statement (more…)

It’s a boring Sunday. Rain beats against my windscreen, my bonnet, my roof, like a thousand fingers drumming a monotonous, impatient rhythm against the glass and the metal. The clouds it falls from have cast a twilight over the whole day, but I think now it finally must be dusk, because the streetlights have switched themselves on and are casting an orange glaze over the dark blue tarmac, under the dark blue sky.

(more…)

let me tell you about my day – i don’t actually say this but I will tell – it’s nice to have someone to tell this to – i like coming home and there’s someone waiting and i tell him about my day – it’s a monologue of course – i tend to do that with conversations – i have so much to say – i go into minute detail – it’s unnecessary but he listens – patiently – you though i’ll tell you about my yesterday – it was a sunday (more…)

“I think maybe we should take a break, from each other, just for a while,” he said, “then maybe things’ll go back to how they were before.” But they could never go back. Not once he said that, not once that one small seed of doubt was planted. Because even if we did get back together afterwards, after our break, it wouldn’t be the same, it wouldn’t ever be the same, because he had had doubts once, and he might well have them again, always afterwards I would live in fear of that, of the doubts he may have. And we would never be comfortable again, there would always be that tension. Long gone were the days of expectation, of sweet denial and hope that one day we would be properly together after those spring nights of dreaming about each other.

And so I walked away.

Lightly rain fell, collecting in droplets on the leaves, blurring the eyes of men walking their dogs, of women jogging across concrete. Josh watched, stared unfocused, contemplated considered, and felt the rain slowly soak into his hair. It hadn’t been raining long. It hadn’t been long since Arietta had sat and stood and hugged him and left. She’d left and he was still sat there. She’d left this time, but he had left her, and he was leaving again.

“Can we meet this week?”

“I’m busy, why?”

“I’m going away. It’ll be a long time until I see you again.”

(more…)